John Mark is changing all the time. It's so fun just to watch him play. The best part about watching a child grow up is, "seeing the world through their eyes." I'd heard it before I had a child, but it never made as much sense as it does to me now. I could watch him do just about anything. He loves simple things like splashing in water, watching me screw and unscrew a lid from a bottle, and making noises with various kitchen objects. Toddlers definitely live a "stop and smell the roses" kind of life - appreciating (and banging) the simple things.
It wasn't that long ago, that he was a little baby, barely able to do any of those things. I remember being at a mommy group when he was four months old and looking at the walking toddlers running around getting into trouble being in straight up denial that that would ever be my kid. I remember going to lunch with a girlfriend with a toddler and being completely oblivious to the fact that in a short while, my child would be the one spilling his drink, purposefully dropping food off the table, or squirming to get out of his chair. It was hard to imagine the sweet angelic thing cooing in his carrier car seat propped up at the table would ever be the cause of so much chaos.
Being a parent to a newborn is probably one of the most challenging things you can ever do. However, even though there's the night waking, bottle washing, and repeated paci placing, they're just so predictable and that, in a way, makes them way easier than toddlers. Between now and his first birthday four months ago, he has really changed. Now that we are in 16 month territory, things are remarkably different. He's curious, loud, fast (I'm now considering one of those backpack leashes, haha!), whiny, demanding, and yet completely adorable and cuddly at the same time.
I know I have touched on this theme in previous blogs: the things that are hard about one phase, are easier in the next, but with each new awesome, easy thing comes some unpredictable, challenging thing. Take feeding for example. I love that he can feed himself (working on forks and spoons and getting better all the time) and that's certainly an improvement from 45 minute nursing sessions; however, now that he's older and can eat and drink himself, it looks like Brandon and I might never drink our own drinks again since he's obsessed with cups, straws, and screw top water bottles. We are just learning as we go :)
One thing I am learning a lot about as I adjust to being the mother of a toddler and not a baby is that you definitely shouldn't pass judgement on other moms. Even though I knew that theoretically, it sure was easy to sit with my sweet newborn baby and think, "I'll never do that" or "My baby will never do that," you really have no idea what you will do or what things will actually be like. Toddlers are just...complicated. They're awesome and so much fun, but you never really know what will make them happy, what will upset them, or how long they'll be able to sit without having a meltdown. I know I sound high maintenance when I try to calculate naps or predict his fussy times, but I'm only trying to minimize the chaos. Having a toddler is challenging enough without them being fussy on top of things, so sticking to a loose schedule (no matter how cliche or mommy-ish is sounds) is the best way to keep things pleasant.
Having your first baby is definitely hard, but when you settle in and get used to it, things aren't too bad. From about 4 months to 13 months (or walking age), things are fairly easy. You can go to restaurants, the mall, and pretty much anywhere strollers are allowed. Now that John Mark won't sit in a high chair or a stroller, things are getting a little hairy and, from what we hear, things will be like this until he's about 3 or 4.
Parenting seems to be all about baby steps. The beginning is rough, but then little by little you get used to handling the harder stuff. If you'd plopped me right in the middle of Toddlerville without having done the newborn phase, I don't think I'd be ready. I'm curious about what is next on the list of good stuff and not-so-good stuff that still lies ahead of us. One mom at school told me to enjoy these young days now because eventually there will be spend the night parties, late night baseball games, homework and studying, birthday parties, and so on. It scared me to think about how much more life with a child will change our lives more than it has already. I guess we'll just keep taking it one step at a time!
