As I was writing Brandon's Father's Day card I was reminded of this post that I wrote back in September that really sums up my love for my dad and Brandon:
September 24, 2012
This Wednesday will be exactly 5 years since my dad passed away. His passing was terrible and tragic, but like most people who have been through tragedies know: somehow you muster the strength to go on (even though for a short while you think you can't). They say that when God closes a door he opens a window. My father's passing was definitely the shutting of a door, but luckily in February (6 months later) God opened a window and I met Brandon. Unfortunately Brandon will never know my father and I'm sure those of you who did know him would agree that Brandon definitely missed out on knowing a wonderful, unique soul.
Even though Brandon will never know him like I did, it's so amazing to me how many qualities that Brandon and my dad share. Some of those qualities are good (like his humor, handiness, and charisma) and some of them not so good (like his love for bantering with waitresses - while humorous, annoying sometimes, haha). The thing I missed most when my dad passed was that feeling of being taken care of. Brandon reminds me the most of my dad in this way. Just like dad, Brandon not only enjoys taking care of me, but he is good at it. From car maintenance to car shopping and from building things to product research, he's committed to helping me and ensuring that we make good decisions. We have been making so many decisions about our family since we found out we were expecting, and even though people know I love to be in charge and make decisions, I cherish the fact that I can rely on Brandon and I don't always have to be in charge.
There are many things that make this year's anniversary of dad's passing harder than usual, but the most prominent is the fact that he'll never get to be "Kram" (this will make you laugh if you knew him) to our little boy, John Mark. The only thing that gives me solace in this sad fact is the fact that even though he won't get to have my dad as his grandfather, he will get to have Brandon as his father. What a lucky boy John Mark is!
My dad was really funny and silly. This was great (even all our friends wished their dad was like ours), but sometimes my sister, mom and I just wanted him to chill out and be calm for just a moment. When we would complain he would say, "Would you like to have a serious dad instead?" and of course, we'd say no. Just like my dad, Brandon will give our children sense of security while also being a fun, "non-serious" dad - I know our children's friends will think Brandon is so cool! Brandon may not know it yet, but I know what a great father he will be. He has just the perfect balance of humor and fun mixed with sensibility and responsibility to give our children a life they wouldn't trade for the world. Living up to my dad's legacy (all his special and unique qualities), will be no problem for Brandon. I can't wait to see him get the chance!
My dad was great and Brandon will be too, but I also have to point out that the kind of parent you are has a lot to do with the kind of spouse you have. I can't end this blog without pointing out that my mother was the perfect balance to my father and that Kara and I needed both of them to have the kind of childhood we had. We are so incredibly lucky to have had the set of parents we were given. I cannot wait to put into practice all the things my mother taught me. Hopefully if Brandon and I can live up to my mother and father's example, then I know our children will have a memorable, special, happy childhood.
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