This sounds a bit dramatic when really John Mark is not as bad as other babies I've heard about. In the beginning, somehow waking several times a night was a little easier (probably because I could nap during the day and because you kind of sleep with one eye open when they first get home). By 7 weeks, he was only waking up once to nurse. Once per night was like bliss. And he was pretty predictable, which was lovely. I can't remember when he started sleeping through the night, but I think it might have been around 3 months. That was even better. However, it only lasted a few nights because my supply dropped off and I had to wake up to pump even though he was still sleeping. I got about 3 nights of 8 hour sleep (before I realized it was negatively affecting my milk) and it was awesome. Around four and a half months we had to give up nursing due to his slow weight gain, frazzled mother, and the impending end of my maternity leave (tearful decision, but I'm trying not to be too hard on myself). So around then I was free to sleep through the night again. I am grateful for a good month's sleep. Here he is from that time period. Things were good!
And then it happened. I'd heard of it, but (again ignorance is bliss) I told myself it would never happen to my baby. Wrong. It happened. The four month sleep regression. Well, for us it happened at five months, but they call it the four month sleep regression. It was awful. Not only were we completely spoiled by then, but I was going back to work the week after this hit. I tried to tell myself that it was a one night fluke, but it lasted from the last week in July until about a week ago. He would wake up multiple times of night screaming. In the beginning he was hard to put back to sleep and it took lots of rocking and shhhhing (side note: while shhhhhing is intended to get people quiet, it's actually a pretty loud sound especially if you want it to be effective). He eventually got a little better and then it became an issue of the paci. We went back and forth upstairs to put the paci back and say a quick prayer that the paci was all he needed. For a time we thought this was teething or an earache or reflux, but a trip to the doctor told us it was none of those - just a growth spurt/sleep regression. Here I am cuddling him on one of his first miserable nights when we thought he was teething.
We tried different methods to deal with this new pattern. For a while we took turns sleeping in the guest room next to him so that each of us had a night "off" every other night. When things got a little better, we went back to sleeping in our room again and traded off nights for who was in charge of the monitor and putting the paci back. Sometimes we went upstairs 5+ times per night. We really didn't want to bring him back to our bedroom since moving him upstairs (after 4.5 months of being in a pack n play beside our bed) was such an accomplishment. Also, he's been swaddled to sleep pretty much since he was born, so we tried not swaddling, we tried a new swaddle, we tried one arm in, both arms in, both arms out... Here I am cuddling with him in the guest room one really bad night. Even though I felt frustrated and sleepy, how could my heart not melt looking at this!?
After trying a variety of arm positioning and a new sleep sack (this one was light and stretchy unlike his original fleece one that was becoming increasingly small), he was still waking up several times per night. Well, in a moment of frustration, on a particularly bad night when I was really tired, I took him out of his new, appropriately sized swaddle sack and put him back in his old tiny one with both arms in as tight as I could (if you weren't the mother of an infant you might think this was child abuse, but don't knock it til you try it) aaaaaaaannnnnddddd....he slept throught the night again after several nights of not sleeping through the night!!!!!!!!!!!! So of course, the next night we did it again and much to our delight it worked again. There was the problem of the too small sleep sack though. You know how in China the ladies wrap their feet really tightly to keep them from getting bigger? Well I had this fear that if we kept putting him in this incredibly small sleep sack, we would stunt his leg growth. Brandon headed back to the store and chose another sack that was bigger, but more like the fabric from the original sleep sack. We put him in it and hoped it would work and luckily it did. Man, is this kid picky!!!!
The photo on the left shows him in sleep sack #2. This is the one he hated (well we didn't know he hated it until we went back to the original). Here he is one night later in tiny sleep sack #1. Instead of getting his shoes bronzed, maybe we should have his beloved first sleep sack bronzed.
Here he is napping soundly in his new sleep sack. I feel like Goldilox and the 3 Sleep Sacks. Finally, one works (and fits)!
This blog has been long enough, but just know that the sleep sack is not the only magic that contributes to our night of sleep. We have our very expensive sound machine (also known as my iPad), a humidifier (not sure if this helps, but the sound makes a nice environment), our AngelCare Movement Monitor (monitors movement, so if he stops breathing an alarm will sound), a paci, and a lovie (that has been in my laundry basket so it smells like me), gripe water (good distraction during screaming fits), and our video monitor. Each piece is integral. Who would have thought sleep would be this complicated and require so much equipment!?
This one below was from one night when we tried arms out. No Go. Also, it's back when we used a mobile. Those are good for about 5 months, but not much longer because after that they just want to grab them and play with them instead of sleep.
Every parent will tell you that life changes when you have a baby. Sleep is probably the most difficult change. I'd like to say that you get used to it (and I guess in some ways you expect it, but it doesn't make functioning on less any easier). However, all the great changes definitely outnumber the difficult ones. Even though there are some nights when I can't wait for him to fall asleep (so I can follow right behind him), I definitely miss him by morning time. Putting my feet on the floor when I hear him stirring is by far the hardest part, but once I start to climb the stairs I remember what I'm going to see when I get to the top. He'll be laying in his crib sometimes wimpering, sometimes cooing, and sometimes screaming, but no matter what, as soon as he sees me he smiles (even if it is through tears). Here he is yesterday morning (he wriggled his arms free while waiting on me):
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